RogueGyver?! WWARD?! The (Ridiculous) Beauty Scenario Tag

Greetings from that place halfway between the shadows and the light, fellow rogues!

Today is a special day. My wonderful Wizard (husband) is submitting his (amazing! Two volume!) PhD Thesis, the bastard. ❤ ❤   😀 Since I am, as you are probably tired of hearing by now, STILL engaged in battling the Thesisbeast – albeit in the very end stages – this means that doing anything academic today has been rendered impossible because of thesis envy. MASSIVE, CRIPPLING THESIS ENVY, with inevitable accompanying feelings of hopelessness and woe. 😀

As you know, however, you can’t keep a good rogue down, and I decided to indulge in a bit of bloggy goodness. Since I am still at work, and don’t have access to all my photos to make a new review post, I am choosing to seize on an awesome tag I just saw over at EyeHeartIt. This is the stronghold of Larie, an awesome fellow scientist and makeup aficionado. She has many wonderful posts, but I’m refusing to stop hugging her at the moment for posting this one. The Internet needs more Laries, is all I’m saying.

Without further ado, then, let’s see what a rogue would do (WWARD?) in these moments of beauty crisis… 😀

Well, What would YOU do when surrounded by green-eyeshadow emitting spiders? Hmm?

1. You have to get rid of all of your foundations and only keep one high-end and one drugstore; which do you keep?

 One of the funny things about adventuring is that, in general, you spend a lot of time in area where the selection isn’t all that great. I mean, sure, your average adventuring general store will be able to hook you up with any number of morningstars and as much rope and lantern-oil as you can carry, but their selection of foundations tends to be pretty abysmal. And that’s if you’re human. Can you even IMAGINE trying to find that right shade of greyish green if you’re an orc?

With that said, the problem is sort of moot for me, as I only own high-end foundations. This is mostly because I’ve never tried any drugstore ones, because they still cost $40 a bottle here so there’s no real saving when you go through as little as I do. My current favourite foundation is still YSL’s powder foundation compact, but recently I’ve been enjoying some excellent skin days, just putting on a dusting of Chanel powder to even things out.

2. You go for an interview, and the lady interviewing you has lipstick on her teeth. Do you approach the subject or ignore it completely?

It kind of depends. If the interviewer seems like the type who might not handle a personal comment, then I won’t mention it. This is most of them, honestly. Either that or the person interviewing you is the lord/mayor/vizier/king/emperor/etc of the immediate area, and probably isn’t wearing lipstick, gender and adventure stereotypes being what they are.

3. You’re not feeling yourself and need a pick-me-up lipstick. Which do you go for?

At the moment it’s Bite Beauty’s Palomino, but really any lipstick makes me feel pretty good. ALL HAIL THE LIPSTICK. *OoOoOoOoOoOo*

Sigryin, staring down the candidates for Best Inoffensive, Battle-Appropriate Lipcolour’. Judging these sorts of things is a true beauty adventuring challenge…

4. You go back in time for a day to your teenage years; how would you do your hair or makeup differently?

Ah, the teenage rogue years. Those halcyon days of missing handholds while scaling eldritch towers because you forgot that you actually have a bust now and can’t get as close to the wall as you could before, and focusing all of your stealth and camouflage skills into your concealer wand. *sniff*

I’m pretty sure my hairstyle hasn’t changed (ponytail or bun), although the length certainly has (shoulder-length to ‘I can use it as a scarf now’). As for makeup, all I wore in my teen years was a bit of concealer here and there, and Estee Lauder Crystal Baby lipstick – if anything. Eye makeup was a completely foreign concept to this rogue, probably because all my RogueMum ever wore was lipstick, with a bit of powder for special occasions!

5. You ask your hairdresser for a shoulder length Pixie Lott haircut but they hear wrong and give you a pixie cut – what would you do?

A) Smile, say thank you, call your mum and cry hysterically
B) Cry in the chair and things get awkward
C) Complain to the manager and demand a refund

I don’t know who that is… *googles* – oh… a trim to shoulder-length and then a tub of ‘make it look wavy and messy’ wax? (Full disclosure: I don’t even know from hair products).

Anyway, here’s the thing; no-one gives a rogue a haircut they don’t want. It’s one of the benefits of the class, actually. Along with increased DEX and the ability to disappear in a cloud of smoke, you get the innate class skill ‘Hairdressers will listen EXTREMELY carefully to your wishes, and then give you the haircut you want, not the one they felt like giving you’. 😉 Let’s be honest though, why go to the hairdresser when you can, um, ‘encourage’ the wizard to learn a haircutting spell?

Chatting at the office water cooler, Ogg and Grogg suddenly realised that they had fundamentally different views on eyeliner. Their friendship was being tested to the utmost.

6. Your friend surprises you with a 4-day city break and you have one hour to pack. Which ‘Do it all’ palette do you pack in your makeup bag?

I *own* some ‘do it all’ palettes (a couple of Lancôme Absolue Voyage ones), but I don’t use them much for that purpose, actually. As much as a rogue must be economical in her kitbag-management to make sure she has room for all the hempen rope, hinge grease, lockpicks and smoke bombs as well as her makeup, I prefer to just grab a couple of essentials. Besides, pretty much every device of conveyance that I own has at least one lip balm or lipstick in it, so I’m usually covered.

Since we’re going to an actual city (much excite!) on this break, I can probably get anything I forget. Dungeons require a bit more forethought.

7. Your house has been robbed. Don’t worry, everyone is safe, but your beauty stash has been raided. What’s the product you really hope is safe?

This is a bit of a moot question, really, since obviously I caught the thief. You can’t steal from a rogue. It doesn’t happen unless we let you, and if we do that then you’d better worry INTENSIVELY about why we might have allowed you to do that and how short your life is probably going to be from now on. 🙂

Since we’re talking in hypotheticals, however, I wouldn’t mind too much if that was all they took. I have quite a small beauty stash actually, and very, very little of it is LE or discontinued. Probably the only thing I’d really aggro over at the moment is my Tom Ford Stavros!

8. Your friend borrows makeup and returns it in awful condition. Do you:

A) Pretend you haven’t noticed
B) Ask them to re-purchase it
C) Secretly do it back to their makeup

Again: no-one borrows my makeup. If anyone is using any of it, it will be something like liquid foundation/BB Cream that can be dispensed, and they will be using it in my presence. Makeup is not really the sort of stuff I share, partly for hygiene reasons and partly because it is so expensive here and each piece is, in its own way, rather hard-won on my student rogue’s budget. No to mention all the artefacts that I have to literally jump over lava/past dragons/through poison spider groves to retrieve.

With the hypotheticals though: if they messed up my makeup I would confront them about it. Not aggressively, but they need to know that such things are not OK. Knowing my friends though, if they messed up some of my makeup, I would be handed a brand new item with profuse apologies in the first place, because my friends are lovely, lovely people. It’s what I would do too!

Right, well, there we have it! Thank you all for letting me distract myself from thesis envy for an hour or so, and for putting up with my rather shadowy presence as of late! If you would like to do the tag, please feel free! Do remember to go check Larie‘s blog out though, because you can never have too much awesome. 🙂

Until next time, fellow adventurers, don’t forget to check for traps!

Syl

I am an adventuring rogue, not a mercenary for hire, and as such, all opinions expressed here are my own, based on a genuine fondness for/interest in this product. If you have any queries or suggestions, please do not hesitate to pin your parchment to the board (contact me) at thepaintedrogue [at] gmail [dot] com., or use the contact form provided! All images and text on this blog are the property of The Painted Rogue unless otherwise stated. If you nick off with any of it, be prepared to find that your morning hot beverage tastes a little…different than usual. Didn’t the rogue say something the other day about that new poison that makes your inner ear itch maddeningly for the rest of your life? I think she did…