Greetings from the shadows, my fellow rogues!
Given the amount of time we spend tucked away under hoods and behind masks, you’d be forgiven for thinking that rogues aren’t really into skincare all that much. I mean, when you’re face to face with a scabby, festering orc, can it really criticise?
People tend to forget, however, that those rooftop chases and dank dungeons are just as hard on the face as they are on the hands and feet. Cold wind, the heat of flames, and the funny thing that the glow of eldritch enchanted weapons does to a rogue’s skin are daily challenges we all face. Often, when you get back to the inn after a quest, all you want to do is wash your face and feel clean again (never mind all that quaffing business).
Enter the ‘Feeling Beautiful’ range from Freeman, a selection of cleansers, scrubs and masks that want to help you do just that. The range is quite extensive, covering a large variery of skin quibbles – so large, in fact, that this rogue has yet to try them all. The four I’m bringing you today are the ones I’ve tried most recently, and include a couple of favourites.
The products I’ll be looking at today are:
The Facial Clay Mask in Chocolate and Strawberry
The Facial Moisturising Cleanser in Kiwi and Yoghurt
The Facial Exfoliating Scrub in Pink Grapefruit
The Facial Revealing Peel-Off Mask in Pomegranate
You’ll note that the packaging makes assorted claims like ‘Deep Pore Cleansing’ and ‘Purging and Fortifying’. I’m going to say right now that I generally ignore these claims on any skincare product. They may be true. They’re probably only partially true. I will never know how deeply my pores have been cleansed (because I’m going on feel alone, and let’s be honest, none of us can feel every individual pore right to the bottom), and if I’ve been purged, then…well…honestly I hope I can’t feel that!
A the end of the day, what I’m really interested in is: does it feel nice? Does it make my skin break out/improve my skin? Do I like/can I stand the fragrance? Does it multitask or save me time somehow? So that, my friends, is what I will be focusing on. The pomegranate peel mask advertises ‘Mega 8 Complex’ – I’ve never bothered to look at what that is supposed to be. It’s a peel-off mask, for god’s sake. The effective ingredient is pretty much mechanical action, rather than chemical, so ‘Mega 8 complex’ means very little. If it had other claims, like ‘repels minotaurs!’ or ‘disenchants evil facial hexes’, then I might be a little sharper about it, but it doesn’t.
So onward with the review. Below are the products themselves. The packaging doesn’t contain any warning about the undead rising from blobs of the product – it happened to me; your experience may vary.
First up is the Pink Grapefruit Scrub. This is… well, it’s a scrub. The particles are quite fine, so you don’t feel like you’re sandpapering your face, and the fragrance is pleasant and fresh (if you like grapefruit). I wouldn’t call this scrub *essential*, but you get a lot of product for your money, and it’s gentle and refreshing. The packaging is a tube. It’s sturdy, and is a good vehicle for the product, which has a very thin gel-like consistency. The only complaint I have is that if you keep this in the shower, the clear cap part can fill up with water, which then cools and dumps an icy shot down your body when you next pick it up in the shower. This is a pretty minor quibble, since it’s avoidable, but it’s worth knowing!
Next is the Kiwi and Yoghurt Moisturising cleanser. This one is a favourite of mine, because it does what it says on the tube. My skin feels clean and moisturised after I use this, not squeaky or dry or tight (which my skin is prone to; too much time on the rooftops makes Sylirael a dry rogue!). The fragrance is very light and pleasant, and the fluid cream/gel consistency is easy to extract from the tube and use. Highly recommended, as it obviates the need for a separate toning or moisturising product afterward (unless I have a particularly recalcitrant dry patch or some eczema, in which case I’m using a specific medication anyway). A must-have!
Third on my list is the Pomegranate Peel-Off mask. Now, this is a bit of a special case. I personally don’t really think that peel-off masks make that much difference to the quality or purity of my skin…but I’ll be damned if they aren’t incredible fun to use. It’s just like that episode of MacGyver where Murdoc peels off his face – you know, the one that gave you nightmares as a kid. Brilliant. The product is a very thick, clear gel with a hint of purple colour to it, and you have to be quite careful when spreading it over your face not to catch any of your eyelashes/eyebrow hairs etc accidentally, as it can be a bit ‘waxing’ if you’re unlucky. It can be washed off, though, if you get it somewhere unfortunate, so don’t worry. I think you also need to be quite slow and gentle when peeling it off, as it does stick quite well, and fast peeling results in a sort of burning feeling. Still, so much fun. Also excellent for startling people in your household or adventuring party.
Last but not least is the Clay mask in Strawberry and Chocolate. I won’t lie, like many clay masks, it looks like you’ve smeared your face with the contents of a baby’s nappy. However, it is a wonderful product if you are prone to oily skin (or oily areas). The consistency is very thick, like a paste, but it spreads smoothly and softly onto the skin, and washes off perfectly when it’s dried. The other great advantage to it is that it can be used as a cleanser for a quick mattifying wash! I kid you not; take a little bit, thin it with water and rub over your face as if you were using a normal cleanser. Don’t wait for it to dry, necessarily, just rinse off as usual and complete the process with your favourite moisturiser. Multi-tasking! The fragrance is…strawberry and chocolate of the kind that you get in products that are not strawberries and chocolate. It’s not unpleasant, and it doesn’t linger, but it isn’t the real thing, if you know what I mean.
The verdict: Freeman’s ‘Feeling Beautiful’ line is a great range of affordable cleansers, masks and scrubs, with a variety of pleasant ‘flavours’ and it covers a decent selection of skin types/problems. The sizing is generous and the products do their job! What more can you ask for, really? (A map to a loaded dungeon printed on the back? Possibly. But you can’t always have everything you want).
The practicalities: Freeman’s Feeling Beautiful skincare products cost NZD 9.99 – 19.95 /USD 3.99 (depending where you shop; prefer pharmacies over Farmers) for 150 mL/6 fl. oz, are permanent, and may be acquired from assorted chemists/pharmacies/drugstores etc around the globe, as well as the Freeman Beauty website. Many of the products also come in sachet (‘travel size’) form, containing just a few uses (0.5 oz) for ~ NZD 3 -5 / USD 1.99.
Until next time, fellow adventurers, don’t forget to check for traps!
I am an adventuring rogue, not a mercenary for hire, and as such, all opinions expressed here are my own, based on a genuine fondness for/interest in this product. If you have any queries or suggestions, please do not hesitate to pin your parchment to the board (contact me) at thepaintedrogue [at] gmail [dot] com., or use the contact form provided!