Greetings from the depths of the darkest dungeon, fellow rogues!
Sometimes, it’s worth delving onto the deepest depths of the dankest dungeon. Usually, this is when the promised treasure is biggest – or, in this case, chubbiest. I’ve previously reviewed Clinique’s holiday set (featuring three other shades in the Chubby Stick range), and this time I’m bringing you two full size treasures – Chunky Cherry and Grandest Grape.
Now, we’ve all probably taken a moment to step back and consider what the ettins in Clinique’s marketing department did with the names for this line of lip products, so I’m not going to harp on it again here. Suffice it to say that while Grandest Grape isn’t too bad, I feel the word ‘chunky’ shouldn’t appear anywhere the name for a cosmetic product, even when associated with cherries (mmmm…cherries…).
As i mentioned in that previous post, Clinique’s Chubby Sticks are a favourite of mine. They apply smoothly and easily from their charmingly crayon-like packaging, and their texture is balm-like and hydrating to wear. There is a very light fragrance and no discernible taste. Chunky Cherry is somewhat sheer, but the pigment it contains is a bright enough pink that you still get an excellent effect, coupled with the advantages of being able to apply it safely without a mirror (essential in most dragon-related situations, I find).
Grandest Grape is actually (I believe) a newer release, part of a ‘Chubby Stick intense‘ line that Clinique brought out, presumably in response to complaints about the modest pigmentation of the original shades. The pigment is indeed more prominent, and as you can see from the picture above, this rogue tends to reach for Chunky Cherry more often for an everyday shade. I should probably mention here that one of my favourite things about the rather waxy, balm-like texture of these is that, in addition to lasting most of the way through your campfire rations, you can easily top them with gloss, without the lipstick dissolving or smearing or clumping or generally looking like you hired some sugar-hyped goblins to do your makeup. This is, I find, an underrated virtue of many lipsticks.
Grandest Grape is a deep, purplish pink – almost a red wine colour, which suits the name. Chunky Cherry is a warm, medium pink, that leans a little coral on me, but does come up more pink on the lips. I think I’ve only ever seen this colour associated with white cherries, but I promise I’ll stop quibbling about the names soon Both Chunky Cherry and Grandest Grape will impart a soft stain (adding to their ~3 hour wear time normally), the latter being, of course, more noticeable.
The packaging is excellent, I find, with a twist-up action (so you don’t need to worry about cluttering up your kit with a sharpener or wasting product) that is very smooth and a snug fitting cap that doesn’t pop off in your bag. The product doesn’t get scraped off on the aperture as you wind it up or down, and the twist up action is smooth. You’ll have to pardon my focus on this – when you spend half your life disarming traps and picking locks, the smoothness of mechanical actions becomes somewhat of a preoccupation…
Like the ones I reviewed previously, these Chubby Sticks impart a sheer to medium wash of colour with a soft sheen. Chunky Cherry is perfect as a ‘my lips but better’ colour with one or two passes, while Grandest Grape will give Flog and Skeletor more pause for thought with only one pass of its deep, pigmented crayon. Both can be used as an ‘emergency’ cream blush, just mind that the finish might be a little dewy. If you have a deeper skintone, you might not get as much value in this respect out of Chunky Cherry due to its sheerness, but I’d be interested to know the result if anyone less vampiric than I gives it a go!
The verdict: These two shades from the not inconsiderable Chubby Stick line are worthy additions to your kit, whether you’re looking for a medium, natural pink finish or a more striking autumnal/dungeoneering shade. I am a fan of Chubby Sticks in general, and can only recommend these to any rogue who likes a hard-working, attractive lipbalm/stain/stick/paladin.
The practicalities: Clinique Chubby Sticks cost NZD 40.00 / US 17.00 each for 3 g/0.1 oz. Clinique products may be acquired from assorted chemists, department stores and Spehoras around the globe, as well as www.clinique.com. I actually purchased these two Duty Free in Singapore Airport, where they cost (I believe) ~ SGD 20.00 each (about NZD 20.00). The lesson to take from this, is you live in NZ, is to either buy all your cosmetics duty free, or find someone to bring them from duty free (or the US) for you!
Until next time, fellow adventurers, don’t forget to check for traps!
I am an adventuring rogue, not a mercenary for hire, and as such, all opinions expressed here are my own, based on a genuine fondness for/interest in this product. If you have any queries or suggestions, please do not hesitate to pin your parchment to the board (contact me) at thepaintedrogue [at] gmail [dot] com., or use the contact form provided!